“To be fully alive, fully human, and completely awake is to be continually thrown out of the nest. To live fully is to be always in no-man’s-land, to experience each moment as completely new and fresh. To live is to be willing to die over and over again.”  ~ Pema Chödrön
In another lifetime I was domesticated: homeowner, gardener, faithful husband, hard worker, gainfully employed, attentive father, son, and loyal friend. The universe had other plans. I was thrown from my safe nest into no-man’s-land. I died. 

To no avail, I tried to climb back in the nest. I tried to regain who I had been.  

Then the universe tossed me out again. I died again. 

      “Unless you drop your personality you will not be able to find your individuality. Individuality is given by existence; personality is imposed by the society. Personality is social convenience.

Society cannot tolerate individuality, because individuality will not follow like a sheep. Individuality has the quality of the lion; the lion moves alone. The sheep are always in the crowd, hoping that being in the crowd will feel cozy. Being in the crowd one feels more protected, secure. If somebody attacks, there is every possibility in a crowd to save yourself. But alone?–only the lions move alone.

And every one of you is born a lion, but the society goes on conditioning you, programming your mind as a sheep. It gives you a personality, a cozy personality, nice, very convenient, very obedient.

Society wants slaves, not people who are absolutely dedicated to freedom. Society wants slaves because all the vested interests want obedience.” ~ OSHO

My father/homeowner personality was gone. Things changed at my job. My employee personality was gone. All recognition vanished. Still I tried to climb back in the nest. 

The universe wasn’t done with me. Another role, another me was yanked away. Both my parents went to another existence. I died.  

I still wanted back in the nest. I grieved for all the me’s who had died. I tried to resurrect them. All wasted time.  

Finally I gave up. Finally I jumped away for the nest. I accepted my deaths and moved on to a new world. I followed my dreams. I seek the lessons in all things. I laugh, love, play, be silly, dance, and have fun. I try to bring light into the world by being fully me.  

I continue to jump from the nest. I slay my dragons until I become too afraid. Then I stop and ground myself. I renew my faith. I know the universe is guiding and protecting me. I know that all the things I need to find the next step are provided in the Now Here.  

This is long. I’ll wrap it up with a quote sent to me by a dear friend. 

“One day you’ll see him and another you won’t. He doesn’t like being tied down–and of course he has other countries to attend to. It’s quite all right. He’ll often drop in. Only you mustn’t press him. He’s wild, you know. Not like a tame lion.” ~ C. S. Lewis
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